As you know, things have been tense between Brit and her boys ever since Kevin Federline said in an interview last month that they’ve refused to see the pop sensation anymore. Their feud continued to publicly play out, with the former backup dancer sharing videos of Britney just arguing and parenting the two kids. Jayden then spoke out about his difficult relationship with his mom, leading Britney to push back against “hateful” comments from the 15-year-old.

Related: Kevin Federline Claims Britney’s Conservatorship ‘Saved Her Back Then’

Now, the 40-year-old singer has taken to Instagram Saturday night to address the messy situation with her children some more. In a series of audio clips, Brit did not hold back when expressing her heartbreak over her estrangement from Jayden and Sean. Referencing her custody agreement with K-Fed before it changed to him getting their sons 70 percent of the time in 2019, she began:

“I used to have my kids at one point, way more than Kevin, but people don’t remember that part because they always focus on the negative. From when they were six to nine years old I had them 70 percent of the time and of course since they’ve been gone, I’ve honestly felt like a huge part of me has died. Like literally, I have no purpose anymore – they were my joy, they were my everything. I looked forward to seeing them. That was what I lived for. Then all of a sudden, they were gone, and it’s like did my heart just stopped beating. I don’t understand how it’s so easy for them to cut me off like that, I just don’t understand it.”

Despite being heartbroken over their strained relationship, Britney then made a shocking declaration – she refuses to see her two children “until I feel valued” at some point:

“With my kids now, making the claims that ‘she’s not good enough, she wants attention,’ yeah, I do want to be heard, and I’m angry. And I kind of subconsciously want to offend people because I’ve been so f**king offended. I’m afraid to inform you guys I’m not willing to see you until I feel valued. I won’t be calling your monitor weekly who never did his job of informing me when you guys were coming.”

Whoa.

Lamenting over the fact that she used to see them on her terms instead of her own, the Crossroads actress continued to note she should have valued herself “way more,” but she was “desperate” to see her sons:

“I gave you guys so much attention it was pathetic.”

She went on to say:

“All I know is my love for my children is more than anything and I’m sorry if I ever hurt you guys in any way, and me saying I’m a child of God is something I shouldn’t have said to you guys — and me saying it’s my turn to say so, that’s something I should have said to my father. I’ve always been told the only person who can fix your heart is the one who broke it. Go to the source. He needs to be told but that will never happen because I pray he burns in hell, but until then Jayden and Preston, I adore you. I was told you guys have blocked me, but I will speak here.”

Such a sad situation all around. We’re just wishing nothing but healing for Britney, Jayden, and Sean. You can listen to what Britney had to say (below):

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[Image via WENN, Britney Spears/Instagram]