Top theater loses its ’Way

The Tonys have blown how tony they once were. Our Great White Way is now Not.

Audiences not going. Old-time names not pulling. Broadway’s become shrunkway. Big names need big crowds. Keesters in seats. Daniel Craig’s play slithered from 007 to 6, 5, 4, 3. Sarah Jessica and mate — oy!, Debra Messing and Beanie tanking. Voters who normally sit for everything — aren’t.

A major name: “Onstage today is crap.” Endquote. And not from my own forked tongue. “Repeats, revivals, reruns, oldie names — the thermometer’s tanking.”

Next year, “Sweeney Todd.” Again. With Josh Groban. Revived at City Center, also Sondheim, “Into the Woods.” Again. Neil Patrick Harris, Sara Bareilles. Maybe come summer, at Sondheim Theater.

One winner’s Hugh Jackman — but, listen, he and that show would sell anyway.

To be or not to be is future life upon that wicked stage.

Governing body

No longer having sex in the city, Kim Cattrall is playing a senator in “About My Father” with Robert De Niro.

Kim: “Good comedies are about family. That crazy uncle, or sister who drinks. ‘Tigger,’ my character, is a senator. Control freak who fought her way. The family’s second to her career.

“Audiences must see this in a theater. Tensions release when you laugh with others. Takes time to get back to where we were. Something’s great about a communal room where we can all exhale.”

Stars fall in line

Whilist burbling about entertainment, how’s famous phrases from famous faces:

Idris Elba: “Women fall in love by what they hear. Men by what they see. That’s why women wear makeup and men lie.”

Angelina Jolie: “Expecting a woman to be an angel, a man must create heaven for her first because angels don’t live in hell.”

Taylor Swift: “There’s no explanation, soon there’s just reputation. I stick with that.”

Picasso: “The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose is to give it away.”

Tell me no more

ME: P.R. people, stop sending items on that shriveled pet Pete Davidson. Suddenly — pardon the expression — he’s in everything. I don’t care about him.

Painting a picture

Artist Mark Kostabi, about whom nobody’s heard forever, is back in Chelsea feeding Latin food, Italian wine, live music, a tap dancer, assorted eaters and himself on his Steinway. Listen, I figured someone may maybe want to know this.

New “Gun” goes Hamm

Jon Hamm on “Maverick”: “My character’s the big gun, Cyclone. The air boss. In charge. At odds with Tom Cruise’s character but needing Tom’s character’s skills. Navy guys showed us ways. Great was Tom in the cockpit for real flying, and the cast of Miles Teller and Jennifer Connelly.

“For me it’s all nostalgic because in ’86 I saw the first ‘Gun’ again and again. Let’s hope a new generation sees this one again and again.” 

No longer world’s richest, when last Amazon’s owner made love to his permanent lady friend it might’ve given new meaning to the word Microsoft.

Maybe not Only in New York, kids, maybe not only in New York.