#Jimmy Kimmel’s Halloween-ruining candy prank is now bigger than him

Every year Jimmy Kimmel urges parents to pretend they ate all of their kids’ Halloween candy, because he is an agent of chaos who thrives on the tears of innocents. Every year adults oblige, apparently unconcerned with any long-term trauma or trust issues that may result. This year however, Kimmel finally laid down his horns and pitchfork. 

“This year we decided not to do it because kids have suffered enough,” said Kimmel, acknowledging the uncommonly hellish year 2020 has been for everyone.

Unfortunately America’s parents didn’t get the memo, many pulling the prank on their unsuspecting children regardless. This Halloween tradition has now grown bigger than its originator, and nobody has the power to stop it. It’s a good thing some kids are getting wise to it.

“You did not eat all my Halloween candy and I know that because you do it every year,” a very savvy little Wookie told their adult.

Even if the kids fall for it, some of them are also striking back. “You still tricked us — we don’t like that,” sobbed a young girl after the prank was revealed. “Yeah, ’cause Jesus does not lie. Remember you taught us that?” 

You gotta admit, she has them there.

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