#George Clooney is directing Ben Affleck in ‘The Tender Bar’

George’s Bender

Ben Affleck — the faux beau temp — on fellow “Batman” George Clooney. They just worked on something called “The Tender Bar” about a Long Island watering hole drama. Affleck tends bar. Dispenses whiskey with wisdom. Clooney directs.

Affleck: “George gave me the absolute best performance notes. He understands how much of acting comes with choices made to connect with a character’s emotional life.”

Clooney: “Ben’s a smart actor and smart man. He was a little worn down but now he’s got a bit of gravitas. Different actor than 15 years ago when he couldn’t have played this part. Now he’s right for it. As soon as we read the script, we thought of him.”

It’s Amazon Studios. In theaters Dec. 17. 

Remember when?

Stuff you didn’t know: Warren Beatty was once a rat catcher . . . Ben Affleck was once into Middle Eastern studies . . . Bruce Willis was once president of his school student council . . . Chris Walken, once talking about fame: “If people didn’t recognize me I’d be depressed. If I walk down the street and nothing happens, I get sad” . . . Once, filming in Prague, Hilary Swank brought along her border collie, African gray parrot, plus her cat . . . Once, Eva Longoria about then-beau NBA star Tony Parker: “When the lights are out he’s the teacher and I’m the student” . . . Once, Sharon Stone on her way-out nude scenes in “Basic Instinct 2” said, “Why tone it down? Let’s go crazy.”

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Ruler of royal portraiture

Ralph Heimans. He did the 9-by-11-foot Diamond Jubilee oil painting of Queen Elizabeth II in the coronation robe she hasn’t worn since age 27. It will forever hang in Westminster Abbey. Now visiting the US, he says, “I was terrified. Six months to complete it and only one-hour sessions with her. She was involved in every decision — even what diamonds to pick and she consulted with Prince Philip ‘on which robe to wear.’

“It was intense. I was a total nervous wreck. I locked myself in the studio. Food under the door. I didn’t really love the pressure. Since you need to direct her on positioning, there’s thousands of protocols. I was told to say, ‘May I take control now, ma’am?’ before making a directive. Except for the queen’s dresser, we were alone. The royal family does not comment but press reports were she’s thrilled with the portrait.

“The robe’s 18 feet long and you need four footmen to carry it. They gave me time with her clothes separately. We worked in the Yellow Drawing Room at the end of a very long Buckingham Palace corridor. The queen, encrusted in jewels, approached from its other end. A theatrical entrance. Footmen carrying the robe. You virtually heard trumpets playing. She stood but had to sit for half because the robe’s so heavy. Then, they give you cucumber sandwiches and high tea.”

I hate to mention a royal flush but don’t queens ever need the loo?

“No. They have this military sense of mentality. The royal family’s disciplined. It was a precious time but an artist needs certain things so you just must have courage to say do this . . . do that. The silvery hair is a characteristic element. Like a helmet the way it’s sculptural and structured. I used a 17th century technique and how the Old Masters built up their canvasses to create these effects. I worked from a dark background to build up the lights.”

A) The guy got paid. B) He’s Australian but lives in London. C) He also painted Philip and Charles.

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Now here’s this

Shani Grosz, who has dressed Deborah Norville, Wendy Williams, Bethenny Frankel, now dresses the covers of Chase Backer’s magazines Metropolitan and Metropolitan Palm Beach . . . Canaletto, Italian restaurant in the East 60s, does white pasta with shrimp. I’m just letting you know.

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Biden, while reading from his prepared script, says: “We need a man to talk back to Russia.” Listen, no problem. I know a thousand cab drivers who will do just that.

Only in New York, kids, only in New York.