Technology

#It’s Elon Musk’s 50th birthday! Here’s what to get him

#It’s Elon Musk’s 50th birthday! Here’s what to get him

Friends, lovers, and enemies, today is a special day: Elon Musk is turning 50. Yes, everyone’s favorite insanely rich manchild is now half a century old. Clap. I SAID CLAP.

To put this into some context, Musk is now double the average life expectancy of a man in 18th century Prussia. And, lord, he’s used that time well, hasn’t he? I mean, have you checked out his Twitter? Inspirational stuff for a grown ass man of 50.

But we’re moving away from the point. What can you possibly get Elon Musk for his 50th birthday? The man is so wealthy that he could afford absolutely anything he needs.

Well, thankfully for you, we have some ideas on how you can celebrate Elon Musk‘s 50th birthday properly.

Join a cool club!

Remember when Tesla illegally fired an employee involved with a union? And Elon Musk broke US labor laws with a tweet about it?

Really though, you can’t spell “illegal” without “legal” — so I’m team Musk here.

When you think about it, shouldn’t billionaires be able to crush workers underneath their feet? They’re worth much more money than them — and that’s the only way I understand value.

Maybe to try and get on Elon Musk‘s level (so we can all hang out), the best thing to do would be to join a cool club? One where people come together?

Yeah, I think that all of us coming together in an organized way is exactly what we should do for Elon Musk‘s 50th birthday. It’s what he wants. I know it.

Send a tweet to properly celebrate Elon Musk’s 50th birthday!

Ahh, the heady days of 2018. The world was a simpler place and Elon Musk tried to barge in on an operation to rescue a Thai soccer team stuck in an underwater cave — despite having zero experience with any of those things.

He came up with this submarine:

elon musk's 50th birthday submarine thai cave
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